Under pressure

I AM an Indonesian and have been here in Malaysia for seven years. I work in a small company, helping other staff do their work.
I am quite free to go out as I want, as long as I have no work to do in the office or house.
But the problem is, my boss does not trust me at all. He thinks I really do not know anything about office work, and every time I make a mistake, he will keep harping on it.
I feel very pressured, and I do not know what to do. I have to work as I have a 10-year-old son and an aged mother to support. I’m the only breadwinner in the family, with no one else to support me. My husband left me when my son just two years old, leaving us nothing.
Thelma, I just need some one to comfort me. I have no one here to confide to. I just cry whenever I feel bad, pressured or get a scolding from my boss.
I’ve only been with this present company for five months. At my previous place of work (where I was for six years), my boss was very good, but the only thing was I didn’t have any freedom as I was required to work seven days a week.
My working place now is very tense, especially when the boss is around. To change to another job is difficult because of my work permit. What can I do?
Mariah

Sorry but you can’t always have it all. You had a very good boss for six years but you wanted freedom. Now that you have a job that offers you time off, you feel pressured by the expectations of your employer.
However, it’s a decision you made and if you are now stuck with it out of necessity, try your best to make it good. Instead of feeling bad and breaking down in tears, show your boss that you are willing to learn to correct mistakes made. Understand the reasons for the tension around the office but do not get involved. Others could leave but your permit does not offer the same opportunity.
All employers should appreciate hardworking staff who takes initiative. If you can do more than expected, he would not be able to pick on you. Do not feel sorry for yourself because many of us need to work, for whatever reasons. Be happier and more cheerful as misery will affect your work performance. It’s easier to make mistakes when you are worried and tense.
Always be positive and life will not seem so bleak. You had a bad marriage but you are still young. Perhaps love will find you again. You have a son and mother to work hard for. Think of better times when you have made enough money to share a life with them. Make friends, share some of your problems and relax after work. You can make life better for yourself if you try.