Used and abused by jerk
I USED to be an achiever, both academically and socially. Then I met J, 38, at my workplace when I was 23. It was not instant attraction but he pursued me till I fell hopelessly in love and lost my virginity to him.
Things were great until I found out that he was a divorcee with three kids, living elsewhere. I was devastated because my principle was never to get involved with a married man.
I stayed on in the relationship and became pregnant. But J convinced me to abort the baby because he’d just started his own business. I did, then discovered that he was philandering. We quarrelled and I left, pregnant again. But I miscarried.
Then I met Bob, who knew about my past but still loved me. We married, had two children and were happy for six years. But my heart was with J; finally, Bob and I separated two years ago.
As fate would have it, I met J again after 13 years. He’s remarried and has another three young children, but is not happy with his wife. He said he’d never stopped loving me, and promised to take care of me and my kids.
I realised I still loved J and gave in to his requests to meet. He kept saying he wanted me to have his baby. When I got pregnant and told him, J was extremely happy. But soon, whenever I asked to meet him, he’d been busy or needed to spend time with his family. Then I found out he’d been seeing another woman.
Now, J just wants to be friends. Again, he’s asked me to abort our baby. When I told him I’m not a murderer, he said he could not carry on with our relationship. I went berserk and phoned his wife to tell her about my pregnancy. Since then, I’ve not had any contact with J.
Part of me wants the baby because it was conceived in love and I can provide for it. But why do I want the kid of someone heartless and mean? My love for J is slowly turning into deep hatred.
Lost in Love
IT has taken you too many years to see J for the heartless, selfish jerk that he is. This man used your body, cheated on you and left you without thinking twice. He has no qualms about asking you to abort his own flesh and blood. He has no love for anyone but himself.
Shake yourself up and know him for the monster that he truly is. Do not even bother to hate him as such emotions are wasteful, negative and a drain on you. You have left a good, wonderful husband for this cheating, philandering evil soul and it’s time you rid yourself of him forever.
The baby in you is sweet and innocent. He does not deserve to die because of his irresponsible father. At 38, you’re not too old to have a baby. Financially, you’re capable of being a single parent. But think carefully before you act. Do not keep repeating your mistakes when you can see, clearly now, how much of your life you have given away for nothing.
Save your love for your children if you cannot find the right man to share your life with. Do not harp on the past or you will end up bitter and cold. And stop thinking that you’re a fool for loving someone like J. Love is sometimes irrational and impulsive. Accept that this relationship is finally over for good and get on with living.
Do not be too proud to ask for help and support. Perhaps your ex-husband will still lend you a shoulder to cry on. Your children need their father, too, so try to establish a friendly, amicable relationship with him, so as to share the joys and burdens of raising your kids.
Give yourself time to cleanse the pain and hurt. Concentrate on work and make plans for your children. Be focused, strong and positive. Never allow a heartless man to hurt you so badly that you forget there is so much to live for.
Things were great until I found out that he was a divorcee with three kids, living elsewhere. I was devastated because my principle was never to get involved with a married man.
I stayed on in the relationship and became pregnant. But J convinced me to abort the baby because he’d just started his own business. I did, then discovered that he was philandering. We quarrelled and I left, pregnant again. But I miscarried.
Then I met Bob, who knew about my past but still loved me. We married, had two children and were happy for six years. But my heart was with J; finally, Bob and I separated two years ago.
As fate would have it, I met J again after 13 years. He’s remarried and has another three young children, but is not happy with his wife. He said he’d never stopped loving me, and promised to take care of me and my kids.
I realised I still loved J and gave in to his requests to meet. He kept saying he wanted me to have his baby. When I got pregnant and told him, J was extremely happy. But soon, whenever I asked to meet him, he’d been busy or needed to spend time with his family. Then I found out he’d been seeing another woman.
Now, J just wants to be friends. Again, he’s asked me to abort our baby. When I told him I’m not a murderer, he said he could not carry on with our relationship. I went berserk and phoned his wife to tell her about my pregnancy. Since then, I’ve not had any contact with J.
Part of me wants the baby because it was conceived in love and I can provide for it. But why do I want the kid of someone heartless and mean? My love for J is slowly turning into deep hatred.
Lost in Love
IT has taken you too many years to see J for the heartless, selfish jerk that he is. This man used your body, cheated on you and left you without thinking twice. He has no qualms about asking you to abort his own flesh and blood. He has no love for anyone but himself.
Shake yourself up and know him for the monster that he truly is. Do not even bother to hate him as such emotions are wasteful, negative and a drain on you. You have left a good, wonderful husband for this cheating, philandering evil soul and it’s time you rid yourself of him forever.
The baby in you is sweet and innocent. He does not deserve to die because of his irresponsible father. At 38, you’re not too old to have a baby. Financially, you’re capable of being a single parent. But think carefully before you act. Do not keep repeating your mistakes when you can see, clearly now, how much of your life you have given away for nothing.
Save your love for your children if you cannot find the right man to share your life with. Do not harp on the past or you will end up bitter and cold. And stop thinking that you’re a fool for loving someone like J. Love is sometimes irrational and impulsive. Accept that this relationship is finally over for good and get on with living.
Do not be too proud to ask for help and support. Perhaps your ex-husband will still lend you a shoulder to cry on. Your children need their father, too, so try to establish a friendly, amicable relationship with him, so as to share the joys and burdens of raising your kids.
Give yourself time to cleanse the pain and hurt. Concentrate on work and make plans for your children. Be focused, strong and positive. Never allow a heartless man to hurt you so badly that you forget there is so much to live for.
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