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Sunday, June 04, 2006

Held ransom

I AM married and in my early 40s. My husband is very loving and we had a wonderful, happy life until he was retrenched a couple of years back. After being jobless for two years, he was offered a job with a modest salary and the promise of a promotion.
The owner of my husband’s new company is in his late 50s. We met once at an office function; he kept looking at me but I didn’t take it seriously.
Soon after that, my husband said his boss would be coming to our house for dinner, and asked me to cook something special. I had a bad feeling about this but kept quiet. The boss came and his eyes were all over me the whole evening.
Suddenly, my husband said the boss wanted him to go to the office to pick up some documents. I was reluctant to be left alone with our guest, but there was no choice.
After my husband left, his boss told me that he’d deliberately sent him away because he wanted to be alone with me. He said I looked good and that he wanted to sleep with me.
When I refused, he threatened to sack my husband and pointed out the trouble we would face. Finally, I gave in. He finished and left before my husband came back.
Should I tell my husband what happened? I feel so guilty.
Help Me

SEX without consent is rape. You were forced to have sex under threat. The fear of your husband losing his job was like a knife at your throat. Know that you are a victim of rape so do not feel guilty and afraid.
You must tell your husband the truth for this can happen again. The employer seems very bold and blatant in his attraction for you; he watches and eyes you even in the presence of your husband. Setting up an encounter in your own house, sending your husband out and then leaving after sex, without looking at the documents, seem like very deliberate and daring moves.
Lodge a report against this animal. You don’t want to encourage him to attack another woman who is similarly in need and desperate. And surely, your husband would not want you to continue offering your body to secure his job. A woman should never be subject to such abuse and victimisation.